Today has been a pretty good day….two weeks out from open ventral hernia repair and one week out from bowel obstruction. I’m having major issues with insomnia but I think it is all pain related.
PAIN….ugh, this is something that I deal with on a daily basis. Physically, I have fibromyalgia and I have had over 35 major surgeries as well as close to 50 sinus surgeries/debridements. I was also diagnosed with chronic pain syndrome.
I hate pain pills…they make me feel gross and the constipation is horrible so I try to ONLY take one at bedtime, except at times like now when recovering from surgery but as of yesterday, down to only one a day and one at night. I have a fairly high pain tolerance and can handle the physical pain most of the time.
Emotional pain…that one is a killer for me. A best friend with stage 4 kidney cancer, a mom recovered from mouth cancer, a sister recovered from kidney cancer and now another very close friend diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer just this week. This is the pain that I struggle to deal with. I cannot stand to see loved ones hurting and suffering and scared. Sometimes I think maybe the journey that I have been on is to help others deal with their illnesses as well. It’s the only good reason that I can come up with anyway.
My “stomachless sisters”, a group of ladies I met online and hope to meet in person this fall. I feel their pain like it is my own as we have so many of the same issues and problems, but at the same time it is such a relief and blessing to have “met” them as there are days they are the reason that I keep my sanity.
So my struggle with pain of all kinds continues so I’m sure this won’t be my last post about it….
One thought on “pain…physical and emotional”
We love you, Candi. And can’t wait to meet in person.